When you or someone you love has an eating disorder

Eating disorders are mental illnesses that can be life-threatening if left untreated. The holidays are a stressful time of year for most people, but they might prove to be even more so for those who have an eating disorder. Below are some tips on how to survive the holidays or help support someone you know who may be struggling this time of year.

Avoid discussions about weight or size

The holiday season is supposed to be a time of joy and gatherings with family and friends, but it can be difficult for those who have an eating disorder because they may relapse or experience significant stress due to having multiple events focusing on food and weight/size.

If you are struggling with an eating disorder, it is best to avoid conversations about weight or size so that you don't feel pressured to discuss your body at the holiday party. Don't be afraid to speak up for yourself. You deserve to have a good time, so if you are feeling uncomfortable in any way, let your host know.

Eat Regular Meals

Try to eat a meal every couple of hours. This will help you avoid bingeing later on because you won't feel as hungry due to eating several small meals throughout the day. Limit Alcohol Intake. You may be inclined to drink more alcohol during the holiday season, but it can damage your body and exacerbate your eating disorder symptoms, so pace yourself.

Avoid being the "Food Police"

Healthy eating is a positive thing, but if you offer your unsolicited advice to others or try to control what they eat, it may come across as judgmental and shaming. Avoid pointing out when others are eating situations that you consider "unhealthy" or "healthy." You don't want to make people feel like they are doing something wrong. Commenting on what someone is eating or not eating might actually trigger them and lead them to binge or restrict later on.

Challenge yourself but just a little bit

But don't push yourself to go overboard...know your boundaries.

Since the holidays are considered a time to be with family, friends, and loved ones, having too many social engagements might increase stress levels for those who have an eating disorder. Don't overbook yourself or feel obligated to attend every party or gathering you are invited to.

The same goes for food, challenge yourself but just a little bit. Pushing yourself too hard depending on where you are at in your recovery could lead to a back-slide or relapse.

Identify a safe person(s)

When the holidays roll around, many people begin to feel anxious as they think about their diet and appearance. It can be difficult to cope with the holiday season while recovering from an eating disorder, so it's important to reach out to others who know what you're going through. This is especially true for those who are currently receiving treatment for an eating disorder.

Talk about your friends and family to let them know how they can best support you during this time of year and thank them for their help throughout the year. Even though you may feel as though eating disorder treatment is mostly a solo activity, it can be helpful to have a good support system.

Many individuals with other mental health conditions can also experience increased distress during this time of year and should reach out and seek support if possible.

Take Time for Self-Care

A lot of times, it's easy to focus on everyone else during the holiday season. Reminding yourself that you are your best gift will help you feel good about yourself, especially when you feel obligated to attend all of the holiday celebrations. It can be a triggering time so it's important to practice self-care afterward.

Some ideas for self-care include:

• Journaling

• Yoga

• Meditation

• A warm bubble bath

• Watching your favorite show/movie

Participate in activities or play games

Meals in general can be difficult for the individual with an eating disorder. Individuals with eating disorders may become anxious as they anticipate a holiday meal. Participating in an activity before the meal can help distract from those feelings of anxiety.

During a meal, eating-disorder behaviors generally increase. Avoiding eye contact, not finishing the meal, and selective eating are just some of the behaviors that can occur during a holiday meal Staying busy with distractions for example talking to people or keeping your hands occupied with games or activities can help reduce these difficulties. It is important to note that the goal is not to avoid thoughts about food or eating; rather, it is helpful to participate in activities that will divert attention.

Ruminative behaviors like self-blame or shame about eating too much at the holiday meal are common after the meal. This may trigger compensation behaviors.

Some examples of distractions include:

• Talking with others at the table

• A craft project

• Reading a book

• Playing cards, bingo, checkers, etc

No matter what holiday(s) you celebrate, chances are that it can be a real challenge if you have to cope with an eating disorder at this time of year. I mean not only do you have to deal with the usual emotional challenges, but you have to do so when food is in abundance. However, the ideas listed above are just a few tips that will help you during this tough time of year. These are just some suggestions, you know your own personal recovery the best.

And don't forget that you're not alone, there are others who are going through the same thing or have gone through something similar in the past. There is hope, no matter how demoralizing it can seem at times.

Happy Holidays!

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