Welcome to 2022!

I began this word of the year (WOTY) journey in 2020. Despite some of the hiccups of the pandemic, I have found it too much more helpful than setting New Year's resolutions I had every intention of keeping but found myself lacking the motivation only a few weeks into the new year. Then came the negative self-talk, and I struggled to combat that negative self-talk. So I began to consider a new strategy after a friend mentioned this concept…. 

If you’re new to my blog or this concept, it's the idea that you choose a word that resonates with you to make sure your actions and intentions for the upcoming year fall in line with the word you have selected. 

In 2020, I chose the word Boundaries. I went in with the idea that I need to enforce and hold firm to my boundaries with other people but, most importantly, with myself. When I chose this word, I had no idea that only a few months later, this would be tested… not with the pandemic but in my own life, in my marriage. It was a challenging time only exacerbated by the lockdown and surge in COVID. I won’t lie, there were times when I was not proud of how well I did, but I was fighting for something that was very ingrained in me from the beginning… marriage is forever; you do what you can to make it work. Well, I can sit back and feel content knowing that I did everything I could to make it work, but like any relationship… it won’t work if only one person is committed to it. This doesn’t just apply to marriage but also friendships, family, and all relationships in general. My boundaries were challenged like never before, as only a few weeks after this revelation regarding my marriage, an even more life-altering secret came out. A secret that I had never expected from a person who, despite the pain, hurt, and heartbreak they had caused me due to their alcohol and substance abuse, I had never expected… a 50+ year secret that only a handful of people knew about. The details and lack of taking responsibility only exacerbated the issue. But boundaries…

In 2021, I chose the world Resilience… after all, I had spent the better part of the year trying to make it through the lockdown, pandemic, and being a therapist in one of the most trying times in world has seen for our mental health. As a therapist, I was expected to give myself 110% every day, despite the world around me collapsing and the life I thought I had in the works was suddenly shaken up. My almost 10-year marriage was ending, and family secrets were being revealed left and right thanks to the invention of mail-in DNA testing. Halfway through the year, I made a switch I thought would be a positive one only to find out later it wasn’t any better; there were give and takes. Focusing on the fact that I could provide better patient care was what got me through it all and kept me going. The behinds-the-scenes aspects are a whole other issue. My family, friends, outstanding colleagues, and even my patients continued to be an integral part of my resilience. A constant reminder of what I had to offer the world and why I was continuing to push forward despite setback after setback. Words cannot describe how grateful I am for everyone who gave me even the smallest amount of charge to continue to move forward and the strength to set that final boundary so I could move on. 

Now comes 2022; my WOTY is Growth! I feel it’s an appropriate next step in my life. I am moving forward and continue to be resilient and set boundaries. To me, this is growth. I am looking forward to closing a significant chapter in my life. One that, despite the heartache and letdowns, I don’t regret. I have grown tremendously over the past 12 years. I am not the person I was back then. I thought I was doing what was expected of me, what I was told I needed to do, what I felt pressured to do. After all, I was 25/26 and not getting any younger. Everyone else was getting married and having babies, so what was I waiting for? However, life had other things in mind for me, apparently. That’s where growth comes in; each lesson in life makes us stronger and provides a lesson to learn. I finished grad school, got married, completed my license hours, lost my mother to cancer, passed my licensing exams only a few months later, underwent procedure after procedure trying to get pregnant, additional losses, moving to a new town that has become home, going back to a job that actually appreciated me. Then moving to a job with many future prospects, would allow me to live comfortably, and helped me become trained in EMDR and become EMDRIA certified. 

What will your Word of the Year Be? What word feels like a good fit for the overall theme of what you hope to accomplish in 2022? What word can you check in with yourself from time to time to make sure you’re honoring it? Throw out those new years resolutions; if you made them… maybe use them to help you brainstorm your word. Is there a theme? I usually begin thinking about my word as the previous year starts to wrap up. Sometimes I have a handful of words and slowly eliminate them one by one until something stands out. Once I have this word chosen, I make sure to put subtle reminders everywhere. In 2020, I purchased a cheap ring from a seller on Etsy with my word, and I have bought another one for this year. I also wrote my WOTY in my journal, planner, post-its in several places, and my whiteboard in my office. This allows me to check in with myself to make sure my actions are in line with my WOTY. 

Despite a seemingly rough start, I look forward to seeing what 2022 has in store. I hope that your WOTY brings you the strength and motivation to continue to pursue your goals. Just a friendly reminder: If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan, NOT the goal.

Happy 2022! 

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